Laughter is the best Medicine

The Name Game
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Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbor, get out of=here."

The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbor, it was the Japanese". "Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same, " replied Spielberg.

In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship." Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me." The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."


Hearing Aid
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A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money.

"How much do they cost ?" he asked the clerk.

"That depends," said the salesman. "They range from 100 bucks to 10,000."

"Let's see the cheaspest model," he said.

The clerk put the device around the man's neck.

"You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed.

"How does it work?" the customer asked. "For 100 RS it doesn't work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder!"


Guardian Angel
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A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you."

The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road.

Once again the voice shouted: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die."

The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.

"Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?"

"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.

"Oh yeah?" the man asked... "And where were you when I got married?"

Fried Eggs
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A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.

Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him, "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."